If you have the personality of a breezeblock, please don’t go on The Voice!

[Brad Johnson | Deputy Print Editor]

Well, now in its fourth (yeah, thats hard to believe) series, The Voice UK has wowed us with new talent that has took the charts by storm and revolutionised the global music scene . . . oh wait . . . nope. Winning The Voice may look amazing but it seems in the charts it carries as much weight as winning an episode of Stars in their Eyes.

The Voice is the BBC’s flagship talent contest which puts emphasis on the singer’s voices. The best bit about the whole show is the red spinning chairs. Fronted by Emma Willis who on the whole is a ruddy good tv presenter and her co-host Marvin Humes of JLS fame who has the same amount of energy as a rock or pebble.

The most impressive assets and drawing point for many are that two of the ‘coaches’ are ‘Will I Am’ and Tom Jones. How they secured them for three series baffles me but I’m sure a nice pay cheque helps. So back to the talent on The Voice. It can’t be denied that the majority of singers are of a high calibre with a mixture of non singers, semi professionals and professional hasbeens of yesteryear. The blind audition stage is exciting as you wait for the spinning red chair but after that, it all goes very meh.

The dreaded battles, where the ‘coaches’ slay six of their acts onto the pile of talent show rejects, are the key part of stage two of the competition. Many of the best acts disappear at this stage because, as you would have guessed from a vocal competition, some of them have as much personality as a magnolia wall. Following the monotony of the ‘battles’ which take place in a camp wrestling ring lit by a wall of bright white beams – how theatrical – we hit the LIVE finals where we find our winner.

When I say winner, I mean they might have a top 10 single if they are lucky and will probably go back to their factory job where they filmed that humourous “I’ve never sung in public” VT at the start of the auditions process, but now, somehow, have loads of confidence in front of TV cameras, an audience and can sing effortlessly with a live band. Just remember “I’ve never sung in public, ” yeah whatever!

So let’s remind ourselves of the ‘winners’. Leanne Mitchell (yeh, me neither), Andrea Begley (wooooo, lets count the top 10 hits) and Jermain Jackman, another chart topper (oh wait, no again). The only success that has come from The Voice UK is Becky Hill from series one. She didn’t even win and seems to be doing better than all of the winners put together. Really, its not about the voice in the music industry, you may have the voice of an angel, but if watching a brick is more interesting, I ain’t gonna be watching you on tour. I’m still surprised that the BBC manages to pull over eight million viewers for this programme but I suppose, the X Factor has finished, the Strictly winner is crowned and we are all poor after Christmas and New Year so it’s a cheap night in.

The Voice winners have released singles which have ranked at 30, 45, 98 and 103 in the UK charts and one album that hit seven in the charts. Even Becky Hill needed the help of Wilkinson and Rudimental to score hits, her own single ‘Losing’ reached just 56 in the UK Singles Charts.

Bring on the Series 4 Winner, the next global superstar.

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If you have the personality of a breezeblock, please don’t go on The Voice!